Tsk Tsk Officer

I like to mess with people. The reactions I get from the crap I pull with people gives me a good chuckle. I mess with people online and in person. It's more fun in person, but it's easier to get reactions online. This blog is devoted to me screwing with people.

I decided kick this blog off with a little internet chat I had a couple of years ago with an officer Heller. I was bored at work and was randomly telling people on my fake MSN buddy list that I loved them. Here is my favorite chat from that day (after the jump):

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

hi lover

Alyssa Heller! says:

who is this?

Alyssa Heller! says:

well......??????

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

i am the internet

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

and i love you

Alyssa Heller! says:

whatsyour name?

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

Mark

Alyssa Heller! says:

mark who? how do i know you?

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

we met online seeing how i'm the internet

Alyssa Heller! says:

when?

Alyssa Heller! says:

where are you from?

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

i would say it was a couple of years ago

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

utah

Alyssa Heller! says:

why are you talkingto me/

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

because i'm bored

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

why are you talking to me?

Alyssa Heller! says:

cause you told me you loved me

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

oh...

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

that would be a good reason

Alyssa Heller! says:

what part of utah?

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

SLC

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

where are you from?

Alyssa Heller! says:

springville, utah

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

fun... so when are we getting married my love?

Alyssa Heller! says:

im your worst fucking nightmare you dumbass this is her husband

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

haha

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

you need to calm down

Alyssa Heller! says:

shut the fuck up you bitch

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

just because i love your wife doens't mean you need to get all crazy

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

we can do a three-way if you want

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

i like it like that

Alyssa Heller! says:

i will beat your fucking ass

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

don't be surprised if i poke it in your ass

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

will you?

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

sounds like fun

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

i'll bring the paddle

Alyssa Heller! says:

bro your messing with thewrong person

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

i'm not sure i'm messing with anyone

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

also in that picture you look like a little puss.. i'm not sure why you think you can act all hard

Alyssa Heller! says:

your talking to a utah sheriff deputy,s yeah your talking to thewrongperson

Alyssa Heller! says:

i will fuck you up

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

oh man... i should send this in to your superiors to show them how short of a fuse you have

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

you really shouldn't be out on the streets like this

Alyssa Heller! says:

oh ok

Alyssa Heller! says:

its my jobto beat down ass holes likeyou

Alyssa Heller! says:

your a little prick who deserves to die

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

that's fine.. but you would have no reason then you would get kicked off the force and would go to jail for police brutality

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

also that was a death threat if i read it correctly

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

that's a pretty serious crime

Alyssa Heller! says:

oh dont worry it would be 'self-defense"

Alyssa Heller! says:

you like chattingwith marriedgirls whom you never met

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

ok.. but you would have to make up a good reason for me to be attacking you

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

and i have a few of your fellow officers who would be character witnesses in your IA investigation

Alyssa Heller! says:

ok buddy go to hell, and get a life

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

you need to calm down that temper Rodney King.. and i'm sure i will be in hell

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

but not until you kill me

Alyssa Heller! says:

your a waste of time

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

it's you're.. not your... your is a second person possesive and you're is the contraction for you are

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

don't you need a college degree to be a cop?

Alyssa Heller! says:

im guessing youroneof the fags who sits at home by themselves, has no firends, and plays with themselves because they aresuch a looser they cant get a girl friend

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

you can think that if it makes you feel better.. i really don't care what kind of opinion you have of me.. but also the word you were looking for was "loser"... looser is a word describing something that has become more loose

Alyssa Heller! says:

ok dumb ass

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

i'm just pointing out common mistakes that uneducated people make... just to let you know that you are a complete waste of space and the world will be better when you are in jail for murdering me

Alyssa Heller! says:

like i siad, YOU ARE a waste of my time

IAMTHEINTERNET says:

yet you are still talking to me.. you would think you would block me if i were really that much of a waste of time